To where I am going, to where I have been

There are more than a million things on my mind right now I would like to write about. Unfortunately, I can only choose one (for now). So here it goes.

I have been patiently waiting (up until this point) for a job or career to come around that makes me feel like I truly accomplished something at the end of the day. So far, I have not found that yet. I have been involved in a variety of occupations to attempt to figure out in what direction I would like my life to go: the food industry, real estate, the newspaper, online publications, the music industry, and even advertising. I still cannot pinpoint exactly where I want to go, even after being involved in so many different things.

I know I want my life to mean something more than just getting a job and making money to support myself and experience the world. I want my life to impact other people on such an enormous scale that no one can ignore me. That sounds so selfish, but I mean it in the least selfish way possible. I have never been one to do things solely for me, except maybe in my teenage years when it was unabashedly about me. I always ask questions, I research topics, I dive head first into anything that interests me, and even open my mind to other possibilities that lie outside my comfort zone. The last one has proved to be the most cumbersome to me because I have developed such bad anxiety over situations out of my control, but I work everyday to overcome this.

Thinking ahead, I need to make a difference on a large scale. It is simply not in the cards for me to get a 9-5 and come home happy. I refuse to be that person. I applaud everyone who can do that, because money means everything in this world. I could easily do this if I wanted to, getting a corporate job working as a public relations professional or even as a consultant. But that does not interest me. I want to travel, to experience life on my own terms, and not worrying about money is the biggest of terms.

My goal after graduation from graduate school in two years is to be a peace maker. I want to be mediating and encouraging peaceful resolutions internationally. I want to be an advocate for human rights. I want to be known for building strong international diplomacy and promoting global peace. I am an idealist, but I am also a realist. I think that may be why I truly believe I can change the world’s view on how we handle conflict. There is more to life than violence, inequality, and competition. I refuse to comfortably live in a world where so many are not allowed to speak their minds, to respectfully do as they please, and to live without fear of retribution for simply being who they are.

I recognize the need for change. I see the future as a chance for progression. I see the past as an opportunity to learn that violence and distrust leads to a poorer society and a sad world. I want to leave this life in a state better than it was when I came here (wow I think I have heard that before). I do not care if I will never see the result of my dedication, I do not care if I will never see true happiness for everyone in my lifetime. I only want to make this world as we know it the best it can be and that cannot be done with the current mindset in American and beyond. We need to work together, power through our differences, and tackle head-on the events that impact one area because we know they affect everyone in the end.

This post is long, but important. I know not everyone needs to do what I hope to do with my life. Many will be content working like everyone else to enjoy the little joys in life like a family and stability. I can say with a fact though that I am not the only one who wishes to shake things up. I want to make an impact, not just for a company, but for humanity. I will not continue to acknowledge people who claim I am an idealist hoping for a utopia that will never exist. I will however, continue to remain focused and guided toward the future I believe in. I hope others will be inspired and do the same.